Turning Off Social Media: Slow Withdrawal

Part 1.

It’s been 17 days now sans Twitter and Facebook. I’m amused that people think that this is some sort of epic giving-up stunt; so many people have reacted with Really?s or How?!s or Why?!?s. For our generation, though, it’s pretty odd to imagine going without either or both of these services, even for a little bit. I’ve gotten more of those reactions because of the Facebook thing, though, which is understandable; I’ve been on it since 2005 and it really is kind of a given assumption that if you’re of a certain age, you’re on Facebook.

Some funny things I’ve noticed:

1. I met some people for the first time this past week and I automatically wanted to ask them to Facebook me so we could keep in touch. How do people actually do that without Facebook, these days? (That is not a serious question.) Taking down someone’s number and/or email feels formal, personal, and intrusive all at the same time. Being Facebook friends is so much easier.
2. Even an old professor from Kalamazoo College (Hi, Dr. Batsell) commented on my not being on Facebook at the moment. It’s so pervasive now.
3. I’ve missed out on a few event invitations on Facebook during this time, actual events that I would have wanted to attend and do plan on attending now that I know about them. Do we not make personal contact when we want people to come to an event anymore? If that doesn’t happen, is that a subconscious sort of hint that they maybe don’t care about your presence that much, if they don’t want to follow up on whether you’re attending or not? I know that this is kind of reading into the situation, but i just think it’s interesting that we’ve lost a lot of personal communication.
4. I have missed birthdays because of not being on Facebook. This is one thing that I still use it for, even though I didn’t go on Facebook all the time like some of my friends. I still feel bad about having to send belated rather than timely wishes. Sorry, Hetty.
5. Photosharing is so much easier on Facebook. I need to actually say things like “Will you email me these pictures so I can see them?” instead of waiting for the notification that I have been tagged in photos on Facebook. I remember when photos weren’t even on Facebook and the tagging thing was new and confusing.
6. I spend a lot of time on Goodreads these days for no reason. It’s not even like I have a lot of friends on it. Besides, what am I going to do with the knowledge of what my friends are currently reading/want to read? This is transference, 100%. PS, check out my books!
7. Speaking of Goodreads. So far, I’ve resisted the urge to update my page-count on my currently-reading books obsessively, even though I downloaded the iPhone app so I could if I wanted to. Since when did our generation decide that it was super important for everyone to know little things that can be pushed out to everyone via Facebook status messages, Tweets, or even Goodreads statuses? I never thought it was necessary to email all of my friends with, “I am on page ___ of __________ right now!” Besides, unless they know the book intimately and obsessively, that’d mean nothing to them. So why do I want to do it so badly? Oh wait, because we’ve somehow been conditioned to do this. When Facebook status messages came out (remember? You had to have a “—first name— is” before every update.) I thought they were the dumbest, most pointless things. Obviously, this was before I got talked into joining Twitter by my friend Donny.
8. I have no idea when anyone updates their blog anymore since I didn’t add feeds to Google Reader. I mean, why bother if you’re just going to see their feeds pushed to Twitter? Well, for situations like this, obviously.

Well, that’s it for now. Ask me stuff on my Formspring if you want!
http://www.formspring.me/justinermd

Oh, and I’m going to inaugurate album reviews sometime this week, starting with Cheryl Cole because I have a weak spot for electropop and English tabloid favo(u)rites. Stay tuned.

Why I like Ke$ha’s music.

(This post has been a long time coming. I think I saved my reference articles on January 7, ha. Oh, and heads up for stronger language.)

So. Ke$ha. (& yes, I’m going to refer to her always with the $ in the name). I think she’s great. Ke$ha manages to make guilty-pleasure electropop that makes you think about morals, values, gender roles, and sexuality in Western society today. It’s also incredibly danceable and probably way too catchy. It’s not exactly that she’s a complete trailblazer; there are plenty of current artists that are bringing something new to the pop table. I do think there are a few unique things about her and her music, though, that make her stand out.

I’ll tackle Ke$ha’s music, first. She writes her own music, which I can respect (Village Voice), especially because it’s the kind of music that’s intended to be used to lift you up, not bring you down: “We’re in a recession and there are wars happening, so when it comes to music, I wanna give people something that brings them joy” (Digital Spy). Her music is comprehensive, too; she seems to combine a variety of her musical interests and tastes to create her sound.

Ke$ha doesn’t really seem to stick to traditional ideas of popular music genres. She describes herself as musically versatile: “I’ve done the country, done the pop-rock, done the super-hard electro… I was like, whatever, throw some rap in there, why not?” (New York Times). Indeed, the way that Ke$ha delivers her boundary-pushing lyrics speaks to how she fuses different musical genres into her own sound. This article says it better than I can:

It’s all part of the continuing deracination of the act of rapping, which used to be inscribed as a specifically black act, but which has been appropriated so frequently and with such ease that it’s been, in some cases, re-racinated. The very existence of the casually rapping white girl reflects decreasingly stringent ideas about race and gender. (NYT)

Indeed, Ke$ha pushes the envelope here not only because of her race, but also because of her gender. While white males like Eminem, the guys from Linkin Park, and Vanilla Ice (yes, I had to bring him up, and yes, I know there are many other examples) have been rapping in the mainstream for a while, female white rappers are a little harder to come by. The style that Ke$ha has chosen in which to deliver her lyrics is one that is still seen as a male-dominated style, but Ke$ha is unabashedly female (she’s all about the glitter) and feminine nevertheless (Village Voice).

hey, so I got a question, do you wanna have a slumber party in my basement? do I make your heart beat like an 808 drum? Is my love your drug? - “Your Love Is My Drug”

Now that I’ve begun to directly quote her music, it’s time for a lyrical analysis. While her work is not exactly PG-rated, it’s through her words that Ke$ha continues to push the listener’s idea of what it is to be a woman, all while continuing in the kind of work that, again, not only artists like Madonna, Lady Gaga (and where she differs from Gaga, I think, is that while Gaga is also all about fun, Ke$ha shows a grittier, rougher edge as well), and Christina Aguilera (“Dirrty,” anyone?) have been doing but also feminine idols like Mae West (LA Times) and Marilyn Monroe. She rap-sings about, again, things that male performers have been championing for ages (and no, she’s not the first female entertainer to do this, but, again, it’s her particular combination of musical and lyrical button-pushing that draws me to her):

I don’t really care where you live at, just turn around, boy, and let me hit that, don’t be a little bitch with your chit chat - “Blah Blah Blah”

pulling up to the parties, trying to get a little bit tipsy - “Tik Tok”

no, we are not on the list, no, we don’t give a shit, dance ‘til your pants come off, party ‘til the break of dawn - “Party At A Rich Dude’s House”

(If you want to compare these to some male-sung lyrics, try… oh… most of the rap songs that have been popular recently. Are we more shocked when it’s women singing about sex and partying? Does that get more attention? I think so.)

Oh, and so we’re all on the same page, I’m not exactly trying to say that Ke$ha is lyrically brilliant or genius or anything. I’ll be the first to disagree with that statement. I don’t think anyone, especially not Ke$ha herself, would claim that she’s a good role model. Of course she’s not; that’s kind of the point. She’s taking the idea of the perfect little female pop star (think early 2000s pop, like early Britney Spears, Christina Aguilera, Mandy Moore, etc. etc. etc.) and turning it on its head. Is there a little bit of the Madonna v. Whore dichotomy in this? Possibly. I think it’s important, though, that people think about the double standard in gendered personal expression that exists. If you’re feeling like Ke$ha’s lyrics are morally inappropriate, think about whether you feel the same way about lyrics performed by men. Think about, next, what this says about current society and what’s morally acceptable today. Then think about the fact that her first singles are the ones about partying and not the ones about actual emotions (I’ll touch on those below).

I personally am of the opinion that Ke$ha is entirely in control of her music and knows exactly what she’s doing. In my opinion, not only is she following in the footsteps of the aforementioned female entertainers but also comics like Stephen Colbert, Sascha Baron Cohen, and Sarah Silverman. Her entire album is designed to sound like one long night of drinking, dancing, partying, and hooking up (LA Times); is this the real Kesha (the lack of the ‘$’ was intended, just now) or is it all just a front? I think it’s tongue-in-cheek commentary on the way we are today, and it probably wouldn’t have been able to be made in any other time period.

I’m also pretty sure that it’s not saying that those come without consequences: there are still songs like “Hungover,” “Blind,” and “Dancing With Tears In My Eyes” that serve as a reminder of what happens when the partying gets a little rough.

now the party’s over and everybody’s gone, I’m left here with myself and I wonder what went wrong - “Hungover”

I’m sick and tired of the mess you wrote me, you’re never gonna catch me cry, you must be blind if you can’t see you’ll miss me ‘til the day you die - “Blind”

I’m fading, I’m broken inside, I’ve wasted the love of my life, I’m losing it, with every move I die - “Dancing with Tears In My Eyes”

Overall, maybe the biggest reason why I like Ke$ha so much is she genuinely seems to do whatever she wants with her music and doesn’t let the music industry dictate how she’s portrayed or the music she makes. That said, though, maybe her entire image is carefully crafted, too. Regardless, at least it’s a message of independence; I can get on board with that. Maybe her music isn’t exactly radio-friendly; I certainly would hesitate before including this in a lesson plan intended for K-12 students. But I still think she’s fascinating and worth paying attention to, just to see what she’ll do next.

Turning Off Social Media

(Disclaimer: My blog posts are auto-tweeted to my Twitter and Facebook accounts; I’m not actively doing it.)

For Lent this year I’m giving up Facebook and Twitter. It’s not that I use those services all the time, obsessively, but like most people my age, I’ve gotten used to having Facebook as something to kill time with (read: procrastinate assignments with) on the internet. Twitter is just another distraction. (I’d give up Tumblr too but I kind of need to access it in order to post these blogs! I just don’t check my dashboard as much.)

What’s been really interesting about this little experiment so far, even though it’s only been the first day, is that I’ve already felt disconnected from things. I don’t mean just the people I’m friends with on both services, but also just the world in general. I hadn’t realized how much I rely on Twitter to keep up with what’s going on in the world. I follow a lot of news services on Twitter, like the Guardian, the New York Times, Huffington Post, and the Daily Beast, to name a few. I’d even taken those same services off of my Google Reader because I saw all of their updates on Twitter. I suppose I have to add that back to Reader before I fall behind on what’s going on.

I’ve been maintaining for a while that the majority of Facebook is totally unnecessary, anyway. I don’t really need to know all of these details about people’s lives, and if they really wanted me to know, then they’d probably just tell me. The people who I really keep in touch with can all get in contact with me in ways that aren’t Facebook and Twitter, anyway, so I suppose this’ll also be a really interesting experiment regarding my relationships.

Well, I suppose that’s the end of day one!